I know who he is because of filthy yet heartfelt fanfic about him. This is the first time I've seen what he looks like, though.

Yet always dirty in mine… rowr.

In an original Sherlock Holmes story, there are deaths tied in with the sending of five orange pips and the Ku Klux Klan. In this Sherlock story, there are murderous feminists who send five orange pips and wear hoods and take inspiration from "secret societies of America."

And the thing is, I have spent so many hours talking about this show online. Not about the mysteries, but about the characters. I even made three not-too-good but sincerely-meant songvids during a procrastination-heavy time in my life.

It occurs to me that the pilot episode was about a… cab 'n' pressure.

WARRR HORRRRSE! Where's my warr horrrse?

I wish the problem had just been a sour ending. I was honestly bored within the first several minutes. Yes, Cumberbatch and Freeman have great chemistry, but it's not *so* great that I'm riveted by seeing them after a two-year gap in a new-old setting with more open male chauvinism. This show has always had…

I switched it off after about 20 minutes. I just realized I wasn't interested in another journey up Moffat/Gatiss's collective ass.

I only just watched the series, so I'm commenting far too late for anyone to see this. Still, I have to say: Every time Fisk talks, I hear Commandant Edwin Spangler from early Malcolm in the Middle.

Oh, yeah, that was hugely prevalent. I myself couldn't write the pairing, because every time I tried to imagine Sheppard going for it, I'd stop and think, "But—based on how he's portrayed…isn't he actually asexual and/or a robot?" But I wrote some Rodney/Ronon and Rodney/Teyla, among other things.

It was preposterous how homoerotic that show was. Of course, the Clark/Lex enveloped you. But I even wrote a long Clark/Whitney story on the basis of the first couple episodes (and righteously avoided calling it Clitney).

I wrote a sort of crazy amount of fanfic after the first few episodes, petered out to watching the show and making fun of it/very seriously analyzing the characters on livejournal for a few seasons, and then I was done.

I do hate it. It did get stuck in my head as a kid, even though I didn't even watch the show (my brother did), and I couldn't even tell what a lot of the lyrics were.

I'm just surprised Scully's lactose intolerance isn't well-known to all of them. He's prone to drawing attention to his need for symptom relief by saying amazing things like, "I think there was some dairy in that cheesecake I ate for breakfast."

Everybody's got a big but.

And Boyle's face at that. I'm certain he was imagining the mouth-feel.

I also thought his suit didn't look good on him. It was especially distracting during the monologue, when he wasn't half-hidden behind the desk. A lot of, erm…lumps seemed to be visible through the fabric.

http://www.foxsports.com.au…

Unfortunately, it does also make the Secretariat song slightly less enjoyable.

When he smoothly screeches, "Heeey, soul sister," I keep feeling like it should transition into the Secretariat theme song from Craig Ferguson.