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The Bourne Valedictorian
avclub-e3019767b1b23f82883c9850356b71d6--disqus

Clearly the OP was not a 7-year-old boy when Star Wars was released.  I was, and let me tell you I had never, ever seen anything greater than Star Wars.  I saw it 8 times that summer and loved it every time.

There were a lot of decent moments in Resurrection that just never came together as a whole.  The "training" and subsequent "escape" sequences were pretty cool, as was the underwater chase and the guy killing the other dude with the Alien hatching.  Overall it was bad, but there was at least a little takeaway from it.

There were a lot of decent moments in Resurrection that just never came together as a whole.  The "training" and subsequent "escape" sequences were pretty cool, as was the underwater chase and the guy killing the other dude with the Alien hatching.  Overall it was bad, but there was at least a little takeaway from it.

The incredibly gory and just plain sick "pregnant chick explodes with aliens in her" is one of the worst things I've ever seen in any movie ever, and will forever be why I completely despise that movie.

The incredibly gory and just plain sick "pregnant chick explodes with aliens in her" is one of the worst things I've ever seen in any movie ever, and will forever be why I completely despise that movie.

Choosing the opening song was a strange choice, since it's one of the weaker (and, save for the chorus) and least-recognizable songs in the whole show.

Choosing the opening song was a strange choice, since it's one of the weaker (and, save for the chorus) and least-recognizable songs in the whole show.

The other option (and I have no idea how many shows offer this) is the "standby" line—I assume it depends on the show but it usually starts forming outside the theater a couple of hours before the show starts.   If any unclaimed tickets are released the people in line get first shot at them.

The other option (and I have no idea how many shows offer this) is the "standby" line—I assume it depends on the show but it usually starts forming outside the theater a couple of hours before the show starts.   If any unclaimed tickets are released the people in line get first shot at them.

About the only positive thing I can say about Prometheus is that it sure looked purdy—I actually was wishing I had seen it in 3D because I bet the visuals look even better.

About the only positive thing I can say about Prometheus is that it sure looked purdy—I actually was wishing I had seen it in 3D because I bet the visuals look even better.

CLEARLY YOU ALL HATE SMART WOMEN!

CLEARLY YOU ALL HATE SMART WOMEN!

didn't Q-Bert always seem to be swearing?

didn't Q-Bert always seem to be swearing?

Just to be safe you probably shouldn't do either.

Just to be safe you probably shouldn't do either.

Apparently a few hours each night, since my two-year-old sings it pretty much non-stop then laughs maniacally.  I assume this was the film-makers intent, and is a large part of why I must destroy them.

Apparently a few hours each night, since my two-year-old sings it pretty much non-stop then laughs maniacally.  I assume this was the film-makers intent, and is a large part of why I must destroy them.

The average girl…taking a bath in blood and milk.  It's an odd video.