I want to see him mow Amy Adams lawn.

Dude, the Mariana Trench is all slum. You want to live high, get yourself over to the Laurentian Abyss or the New Britain Trench. The latter being especially tony.

Cormac would have made that one paragraph with no punctuation.

I loved the Burt Reynolds films of the 70s. Deliverance arguably the best, but the one that holds a special place in my heart is WW & the Dixie Dancekings.
(for some unfamiliar with the various types of gasoline available at one time, the joke below will only confuse you)

Lorde Michaels, you have Freddie Mercury holding on line one, and also a Syd Barrett on line two.

Please provide a list of those worthy of discussion, and I promise you all of us here at the AVC will adhere to it.

Piss urine.

I know, right? Priorities, my friend. Priorities.

**tilts glass at Beer Baron**

I want one of those "Cure" t-shirts with a picture of Jonas Salk.

I'm assuming you mean a "10-year old Chinese sweatshop worker", which would probably make that person tenured enough for management.

You bastard! My real name is Steve Bell!!

I have the opposite opposite problem. I'm 5'11", and tend to try to be taller than everyone else around me. I'll get closer to look down on those shorter than me, and have stood on my toes to see taller people eye-to-eye.
Yeah, there's stuff wrong with me.

You NEVER know what will happen when #AGT is live!
Flaming arrow through the shoulder!
Decapitations!
Rottweilers latching onto crotches!
Howie finally shakes someone's hand!
Klieg lights crushing small children!

I knew someone would beat me to this…

Noon-thirty central? You need to get a better jump on the day.

Thank you. Your unassailable logic has changed my mind - I will be voting Trump!

A friend of mine posits that Trump is the perfect candidate for America. In his words:
"He is a loudmouth, a braggart, a bully, thin-skinned, quick to temper, quick with retribution, uneducated, unconcerned with facts, thinks opinions are facts, narcissistic. He is, in fact, most of us."
I don't agree that he is "most…

She must not live in the lower 48.

Careful, disparaging Criterion at the AVC is a bootable offence.