My favorite gag of the entire series. Especially his reading of "I DON'T KNOW" when Lois asks him where he's been.

When the movie was released, Chevy Chase was on Carson as the lead guest promoting it. The second guest was Roger Ebert, who when prompted by Johnny to name the worst film he seen recently, named Three Amigos.

What can you say about such men?

Nope. Paul's Hoffner bass.
(ok, technically not a guitar)

So, the Ant-Man project wasn't exterminated?
*dodges thrown objects*

*pictures Jean Claude Van Damme in unitard, vomits profusely*

My girlfriend in 1983 insisted I put on "Let's Pretend We're Married" and keep the rhythm with my tongue. Subsequent girlfriends of Dave had her to thank for my extraordinary tongue-endurance.

*makes note to add personal email address when making perverted comments about Anne Hathaway*

Wait, wait, wait! You graduated high school in '05? So you where born around '87? Jesus, I was having sex with my girlfriend with Prince records playing in the background before you were even born!

In my opinion (and yes, it's MY opinion), Prince is the single most talented musician of the last 30 years. Writes, produces, plays everything - and plays the hell out of everything. As much praise as he was given, I never thought Michael Jackson was talented enough to even stand in Prince's shadow.

I've been waiting for him for an hour.

Pornhub?

*gives O'Neal a blanket and bottle of Glenfiddich*
Shhhh….it's ok, honey. You don't have to snark if you don't want to.

Boy, did I read that headline wrong!

here, i'll use google translate for you, senor: Yo estoy viendo doble aquí - 8 comentarios repetidos! Muy biennnnn!

On a semi-related note, I've never tried Nutella.
Is it any good?

Hell, I'm bald!
*sues woman that Brazilian waxes Cameron Diaz*

I've nailed a coupla' drunk party tricks!
**snare hit**

No lie, I've heard it's as cold as hell.

I can attest that I AM NOT Dikachu. That's as plain as the nose on my face.