Apart from the t-rex scene, Jurassic Park is shit.

Press Gang also provided enough tetraplegia jokes to get all of us through several puberties.

How's your fuckin' ear?

It had that grainy look of DV. Obviously not shot on an Arri Alexa.

Yeah, I saw a version of Akira that looked like it was spooled through a wire brush and coated in pube shavings.

Freddie Starr Ate My Projector.

I felt cheated during the opening frames of Tinker, Sailor, Soldier, Spy when I realised it was shot on DV. I get to go to the cinema so rarely that when I do I expect to see a film shot on film! But I got over it because the film was really good.

Eric Idle gets a few anecdotes in, but no-one's allowed to go on and on about anything. Even at around 220 minutes there's no fat on it. George Harrison lived a very full life.

What I Watched at the Weekend:

That's a rhetorical question. I am right.

Breaking Yawn, amirite?

Because they're the source of 'Hunger Dunger Dang' according to the article I just read.

And when they met, it was MOIDAH!

Nein … wie schade.

It is, JQ. Especially after seeing, in the documentary, these old guys living very ordinary, humble lives in the Mid West, their brief rockstar lives long in the past, now making a bare living doing things like cleaning churches, then walking onto a stage in a packed auditorium to an ecstatic crowd. Also cool: getting…

Creatively.

I have never heard of Collective Soul. Or Tonic. Is there a Gateway To Mediocrity for people like me?

'Monks: The Transatlantic Feedback' - you don't need to know anything about this great, short-lived band to be fascinated and moved by this doc. It helps if you like the idea of a '60s beat band comprised of GIs stationed in Germany who are moulded by a German conceptual artist to make primal, feedback-drenched pop…

It's not even in 3D.

What?