*Hugh Glass grins*

Can you imagine? What a grizzly scene it would have been…

We can have nice things, but we sure don't deserve them. Not with all the bear rape talk these days.

Where the hell is @cuddlebastard? This is right up his alley, so to speak.

The Chan Zuckerberg Initiative, which will initially be dedicated to
“personalized learning, curing disease, connecting people and building
strong communities,”

Kony gave it five stars!

"I can't let you do that, Fox."

You think there'd be more of a musical tone to the writing:

Depends on the frequency! Ha cha cha!

I headbutt vaginas all the time. It's easy once you ignore the complaints.

Cookie Elf slash fic is shockingly sweet.

Morrissey never loses.

"Third Glass of Wine"

Whatever keeps them from ripping my tender flesh.

Kids' names:

Kip! It's a serious condition.

Super enthusiastic upvote for use of paleontological ferroequinology.

Child services? OMG, do they deliver?

At the risk of sounding juvenile, I prefer to stay home and play withby myself.

*Patton Oswalt likes this post*