Ooh! I get to be that guy! Technically, Westeros had a female monarch for a few months. Rhaenyra Targaryen! (I only know cause I just read that companion novella last night!)
http://awoiaf.westeros.org/…

I get what you're saying, and the show definitely fails to explain character motivations to an anywhere near acceptable degree, but I do think that the ending was all about spurned love. I think Vane failed to speak up because he was so disheartened at losing Eleanor, and he knew that nothing he could say would…