Hey Dan! You dropped your training bra!

Come on, man. We're trying to have a serious discussion here and you're ruining it.

I dunno, I'm a big name pop star (you'd be surprised at who I am), and there was this one kid who only had one wish: to write a song for me to put on one of my albums. So, my manager sets it all up and the kid comes out to my estate. His mom wheels him up, and we go into my studio.

Great. Here we go with the Make-A-Wish kid bashing again! Way to keep it classy, Hatford!

Well, duh.

Goodbye, person.

So, Cleveland steamer then?

You got me all choked up, you're my little Boston strangler…

Classic Freud!

Sounds like there aren't any mammarable tracks on this album.

Buzzfeed.

Snuggle Fucks Vol 3

I just call you Doody.

Katy Perry to out and proud teen girls: "FUCK YOU".

You'd eat sausages off of them? What would Freud say?

Milk!

Hear that? That's the sound of erectile dysfunction my friend.

GOODBYE, BOOBIES!

I call bullshit. You want to listen to her problems, and make her some chamomile tea.

There are no more closeted teen boys anymore, thanks to the mega-inspirational Katy Perry song "Firework".