Fine. I call your bluff. By the power invested in me by the State of the Union, I herby sentence you to one (1) official lawsuit. Please put your hands up and behind your head and get on the ground and inside this car. Let me help you with that and watch your head. Good night and good sir, sir or madam.

…I…I honestly can't tell if you are bad at being sarcastic or you are bad at being serious.

I feel like Arby's thinks that humans are actually dogs.

Am I using that right?

It can be two things!

Morty made the number one mistake for male teenagers: Always
remember to shout out a fake question to make absolutely certain that nobody
else is home.

My high school's theater preformed Noises Off. After finishing it, my friend who was in the play was freaking out and told me that they missed a minor thing and everybody was doing improv or stalling for about two minutes until they got back on track. And I was like, "Yeah you know that none of the audience noticed,…

I'm sure Millennials will find a way to see the movie without paying for it.

Sometimes I post comments so late they are guaranteed to get like, 2 or 3 up-votes, tops.

The A.V. Club
Tragic.

Well, for one, he collapses churches.

Or Ratatouille.

Most directly: “Ricksy Business” and the reveal that Rick's catchphrase "Wuba-luba-dub-dub!" is a cry for help.

"Major" is his Dungeons 'n' Dragon character.

Why thank you, but while my comment was fairly well crafted—and quite possibly a masterpiece—it doesn't even come close to as well-crafted as this episode of Rick and Morty was.

I'm sure it's not a coincidence why that's many people's favorite episode.

Know her? I hardly even know her!

"First race war, huh, Summer?"

I'm really starting to hate this season of Rick and Morty because I know I'll never be able to create something this funny, insightful, or tragic.

Well now you've given enough information away that a random person can just google "MIT professors with initials eb" and the first thing that pops up clearly highlights his name.