Ducks are nice, but they poop all over the place.  I'll stick with alcoholism and soul-crushing loneliness.  It works for me.

"Disappeared" is my favorite track off of the new Aimee Mann album.  I didn't really make the Chrissie Hynde connection, but there certainly is a similar deadpan, weary wit that they share.

"Disappeared" is my favorite track off of the new Aimee Mann album.  I didn't really make the Chrissie Hynde connection, but there certainly is a similar deadpan, weary wit that they share.

It is rivaled only by a track off of "Christmas in the Stars" (the Star Wars Xmas album) called "What Can You Get a Wookie for Christmas (When He Already Owns a Comb)".

It is rivaled only by a track off of "Christmas in the Stars" (the Star Wars Xmas album) called "What Can You Get a Wookie for Christmas (When He Already Owns a Comb)".

I scored a copy of this a while back— pre-YouTube and bittorrent, when it was still pretty hard to find.  My annual Christmas tradition was to get drunk on bourbon spiked egg nog and see how long I could sit through it.  I never made it all the way through.  Might have to resurrect that tradition this year.  Tis the…

I scored a copy of this a while back— pre-YouTube and bittorrent, when it was still pretty hard to find.  My annual Christmas tradition was to get drunk on bourbon spiked egg nog and see how long I could sit through it.  I never made it all the way through.  Might have to resurrect that tradition this year.  Tis the…

Submitted as worst Pitchflake review ever: http://pitchfork.com/review…

Submitted as worst Pitchflake review ever: http://pitchfork.com/review…

Does she realize that her TV show is being recorded… by like microphones and stuff?  I'm watching this show now and she seems to be yelling near-continuously through the episode.  At one point she actually yelled "AM I RIGHT PEOPLE?" non-ironically.

Does she realize that her TV show is being recorded… by like microphones and stuff?  I'm watching this show now and she seems to be yelling near-continuously through the episode.  At one point she actually yelled "AM I RIGHT PEOPLE?" non-ironically.

Let's just agree to cast Melissa McCarthy in a recurring role on HBO's "Girls" so that we can quarantine talentless crap into a hermetically sealed talentless crap containment unit.  Did we learn nothing from Ghostbusters?

Let's just agree to cast Melissa McCarthy in a recurring role on HBO's "Girls" so that we can quarantine talentless crap into a hermetically sealed talentless crap containment unit.  Did we learn nothing from Ghostbusters?

Yeah, it was a cheap shot.  I apologize.  Not for the fart-smelling comment, though, because seriously that guy always looks like somebody let one.

Yeah, it was a cheap shot.  I apologize.  Not for the fart-smelling comment, though, because seriously that guy always looks like somebody let one.

Next week, on a *very special episode* of Person of Interest: Jim Caviezel denies the holocaust while shooting some random jew in the face!  And Michael Emerson wanders around his apartment, looking like he just smelled a fart!  All this AND some heavy handed monologue about technology or something on CBS's Person of…

Next week, on a *very special episode* of Person of Interest: Jim Caviezel denies the holocaust while shooting some random jew in the face!  And Michael Emerson wanders around his apartment, looking like he just smelled a fart!  All this AND some heavy handed monologue about technology or something on CBS's Person of…

Not a counterpoint so much as proof of my original point… but good catch, nonetheless.

Not a counterpoint so much as proof of my original point… but good catch, nonetheless.

Yes.  New Girl is so meta.  Just like HBO's "Girls", we're all expected to ironically enjoy how terrible it is.  Because the Cool Kids have sharpened their cynicism to the point where enjoyment of anything that isn't *fucking terrible* is considered downright tacky.  Comedy is dead, long live comedy.