I was going to quote that!
Though the best part of the press conference was when a local TV reporter asked him quite earnestly "What's your message, Billy?".
Without missing a beat, he said "Buy my records!``

I interviewed Billy Bragg at a press conference in 1989, and wrote a piece about how he was struggling to balance being a pop star with his socialist sensibilities in the face of Perstroika.
I'm not surprised that he's evolved in the 24 years since, but I am shocked that people's expectations of him haven't. I'm sorry…

I used to own an '84 Tercel hatchback, though it was the 2-door with FWD.
I loved that car. I still kick myself for selling it.

The "B" is for "Boo-urns".

"This video has been removed by the user."

The thing about Sheldon is that while he's utterly amoral, he's also extremely ethical.

I'm sorry. You live in a world where that movie exists, and if we go there, we will burst into flames. Or not, maybe.

We must keep the knowledge of this film from Neil DeGrasse Tyson.
He would scream "THAT'S NOT HOW GRAVITY WORKS!" so loudly that gravity would stop working.

"Hey, I'm like totally James Franco being, like, a Wizard, you know. I got the hat so… Yeah, I guess I'm committed to this."

When are they going to get to the FIREWORKS FACTORY?!

Thanks for sparing my pause button.

If he even got to pretend to be married to Felicity Kendal, then he really did live a good life.

I think Ted may even have hallucinated that he was with Becky at the time. No one else saw her or even knew he was dating her. 
It's possible he just "enjoyed a hot dog" while watching her old commercial and "enjoying a sandwich". Then when he saw her picture at the Captain's, he just freaked out and thought he'd…

And there was Rocketman, trying to get out, and here comes the cliff, and just before the car went off the cliff, he jumped free! And all the kids cheered! But I didn't cheer. I stood right up and started shouting. This isn't what happened last week! Have you all got amnesia? They just cheated us! This isn't fair! HE…

Yeah. Jeff is gone. Give it a C+ if you have to, but deal with it.
He's gone.

U R HITLER!

One episode per week? That's very 20th century of you.
I want everything now, for free! And then I want to be rude to strangers on the internet about it, IN ALL CAPS!

Season One and Harold Ramis get short shrift here.
Moe Green! Muley's Roundhouse! Grapes of Mud!

Speaking of untalented, unfunny losers who desperately latch onto the success of others…

Blimey! I'm a bloody cowboy, wot!