Only manatees with idea balls can properly replicate a decent Family Guy episode.

I'm inclined to agree; I must admit, it was shocking enough to post on the message boards. Did you see the episode? Toed the line a couple of times.

Decadence that is tufted, frilled, embroidered, waved, coiffed, starched, and ironed within an inch of it's life.

"That's hotter than phone sex with a blind girl."

I've got to say, they aren't as bad as those Phillies (sorry, JVS) throwback jerseys, or the Brewers' shit-mustard / baby blue color combinations. Still, I find it kind of silly that Boston fans need a literal visual interpretation of their team on ballcaps. I think we all know what "red socks" look like.

I enjoyed…
… Anne of Cleves / Oscar Wilde / Geoffrey Chaucer's cameos.

I just got off the phone with Theo Epstein; apparently, they're looking good going into the season and a playoff berth is predicted, especially with the addition of Smoltz. Also, he's angry that his team's good name is actively being besmirched by Dane Cook.

Goddammit, Dr. Strangelove. You stole my post. I'm glad to see some Clubbers are aware of Keeping Up Appearances; I stumbled upon it at 2 AM one night, completely by accident.

I only liked Billy Bob Thornton…
… in Angelina Jolie.

Free-basing solvent fumes…

I know a deserved a lil' hating for my comment. If I recall correctly, however, the last time the Mets and Red Sox faced off, we came out on top, thanks to Buckner, of course. Now if we could only get some of that 'Mazin' Mets mojo back…

… which of course you apply using the douchenozzle on the mousse can.

@ Orthodox Athiest: I agree. I'm going to roust the ire of some Beantown locals, but I think he's a douche for his perpetual Red Sox hat. I'll bet he can't even recite their lineup.

Douche? What is douche, o' jesting Pilate?

My list:
Gettysburg. When Martin Sheen rallies the Confederates to prevail and the music swells. Beautiful.

I'll see your Last of the Mohicans and raise you a Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee.

"Merry Christmas, Bedford Falls! Merry Christmas, you beautiful old building and loan!"

I saw…
… James Toback and Tyson on Charlie Rose a few nights back. Tyson seems, well, let's just say he seems heavily medicated. No profanity, no arrogance, no danger - he's a changed man, post-prison.

I, too, have a history degree, and I'm backing wammer's logic that Gladiator's tough to enjoy, at least from a historical perspective. So is the Patriot and shitty fucking shit like the Da Vince Code, if you'll excuse my language. Look at John Wayne films - love 'em, but historically they aren't sound. I spend my…

He's already got Watergate Immigration and Naturalization Center… get it?