Fact.

It wasn't one of those fancy singing cats. It wasn't even Garfield.

Yeah. I'm more confident that Adnan is guilty than I am that Steven Avery is.

He certainly looks guilty, and that's enough for me!

Hey. Don't try and pin my uncle's alleged crimes on me.

Hard to argue with that logic.

I think that most reasonable people can agree that, yeah, Mr. Avery probably committed murder, which is a tragedy.

Trapist!

He's like Prince, but, you know…

I have a soft spot for him in the movie Family Man. It's basically a shitty remake of It's a Wonderful Life. I just happened to see it at a moment in time where the corniness didn't phase me much.

He invented the piano key necktie.

"How Do I Live," I'm guessing, as Titanic was mostly beloved by suburban tweens.

But then, in a Shyamalan twist, you take your paltry Yearwood royalties to live out your days on a second-rate beach resort only to discover that you are allergic to water and your cabana boy has been dead the whole time.

Sure you can. You can DVR anything with nipples.

"Nancy devised the massive rear-end collisions of sworn enemies, hate-deaths celebrated in the engine fuel burning in wayside ditches, paintwork boiling through the dull afternoon sunlight of provincial towns. She visualized the specialized crashes of escaping criminals, of off-duty hotel receptionists trapped between…

Just throwing it out there for you poor bastards who haven't seeen it: "Nicholas Cage Losing His Shit" has to be one of my favorite YouTube videos of all time.

He still sucks the dick, but it's been doing pilates, so it has thinned out a bit.

I take it you live next door to Roger Sterling and his Old Kentucky Home?

Would've worked better as a line in a Pirates of the Carribean flick.

This lineup seems worse than last year's, which was worse than the year before.