He's got a hoodie! Look out!

It's more than a little disappointing that society has decided that if a privileged guy does something shitty and then doubles down on his shittiness, he shall be rewarded.

Charles Schultz can eat a bag of buttholes. I really hope I'm not the first person to ever type that sentence.

They had the Simpsons and TMNT arcade games. What else does a kid need?

I have a Blondie/Parallel Lines picture disk that I'm so fond of that I can't imagine putting it on a turntable.

I always thought that it was a little fucked up—and by a little, I mean a lot—that no one ever really mentions that this mission was basically just "let's shoot this animal into space and see how it dies."

SPOILER: Willis is the dead.

I'm creating a list of character types that a male actor has to play in order to be considered a success:

Gotta say that I do love seeing an old abandoned Pizza Hut that has been repurposed into a dentist office or a US Bank.

I was always fond of the Pizza Hut commercial that was on my Land Before Time VHS, as well as the little rubber puppets tie-ins that Pizza Hut carried.

I usually have the opposite experience.

I've been craving Little Caesar's for the past few days—I think because of all the stories about Joe Louis Arena closing and being replaced by Little Caesar's Arena—but my girlfriend refuses to eat their pizza, rightfully labeling it "garbage." As a result, I rarely eat it, and I am mocked when I do.

Earning that shitty little pizza was better than any award I will ever receive, and that probably explains why I still enjoy the even shittier version they serve at combination Taco Bell/PIzza Huts.

I've had it in Chicago, but, since I didn't grow up eating Sarpino's, I can definitively state that Pizza Hut is superior.

Yup. Although I prefer the taste of at least a dozen other "upscale" local pizza places to Pizza Hut, I rarely crave any of them the way I do Pizza Hut's offerings.

Two things? Great Scott!

Tally ho.

No, no, no. That was written for a little Japanese boy.

Weak.

Frasier would like a word with you.