I love the Gorey poems:

When a fire starts to burn…
There's a lesson you must learn…
Something, something…
Then you'll see…
You'll avoid catastrophe!

Heavily armed goons?

If you got covered in that repulsion gel, I've got a note here from the boys in the lab:  "Do NOT get covered in the repulsion gel."

Yeah, I was discussing this with the other people at an Oscar party.  When people are voting for the Best Animated Feature, are they voting for the better movie or the movie with the more impressive animation?

People should really, really watch Two Fat Ladies, and not at all for the food preparation, most of which looked disgusting.  It was just a terrifically funny, awesome show.

Maybe it's more an issue of buzz.  That is to say, once the conversation turned from "What an awesome movie!" to "All anyone can find to say about this movie regards its torture message," it lost the attention it needed to garner votes.

Add my voice to the chorus of people excited for this column.  You could write a dissertation on beer commercials alone.  I'm still amused/angry/puzzled about the one where the guy drinking his 4.2% alcohol light beer at a wedding reception sneeringly condescends to that pussy drinking his 12.5% alcohol wine for not…

I'd never choose to see this, but I had a date who wanted to go.  The C+ is pretty damn generous.

I know!  Did none of these people read The Westing Game?

Fronch fries, Fronch dressing, Fronch bread, and to drink…Peru!

Chris' reaction shots are always great, but the one he gives the camera after Leslie calls them a bunch of uggos who need to come up with some good jokes was pure gold.

Succrumbs.

Tell them I hate them!

You can do anything you put your mind to.

Not that I think she should have made this list, but I'd love Shirley to bring out some Big Cheddar one more time.

Now think of it as the Fact Sphere from Portal 2.

#1 most overused phrase in modern American communication.  It drives me batshit.

I think the LAPD took the rap as America's most hated police department given the Rodney King incident by the 90s.

Nobody is beneath the terribleness of "What's Up".