I don't know who any of these people are, but I've already decided I hate them.

Mmmmmm… movie jelly…

May I respectfully volunteer to be your surrogate?

You can judge all you want, but "Rent" still works for me.

"I'm honestly freaked out by the idea of online dating…"

Of course not! I laid it out there. This is, like, my safe space to discuss these things, 'cause Girlfriend doesn't come here.

Because after the last breakup, I did essentially write off Friend as relationship potential. (She was pretty emphatic about it, and to be fair, I am AWFUL to deal with.) And then Girlfriend and I got together, and we've hit the 5-year mark, and have a lot invested in it, and yeah, it means a lot that she didn't even…

If she had a reason to come to Atlanta, sure, but otherwise, it seems unlikely. That would be a significant expense!

To be clear, I don't have such a visit planned, but I would really like to see Friend.

Just go down and I'll tell you when to stop…

Well, it's not like it's not mutual…

Ahaha… well here's the thing. Girlfriend and Friend have never met. But Another Friend told me that Girlfriend once said of Friend, "I hate her, because he loves her."

I'm similar, Mrs. Alger, but my relationship has an interesting wrinkle:

Agreed. I'm skeptical that anyone could jerk me better than me.

"Yes, you can get all three recordings on iTunes, NGAA, but you need to listen to them on vinyl…"

Well, that's everybody here…

This is why the AV Club was created.

We KNOW who Wendell is. This IS the AV Club, sir / madam/ other on the spectrum!

He's the star of a beefy twilight. Makes perfect sense to me.

THE OCEAN IS AWESOME AND FOR WINNERS!