Damn commies and their rational, base-ten system of measurements.  If some king's  foot was a good enough measuring unit for my pappy, it's good enough for me!

Look into your heart!

True story: "Metal Health" was the first song I played with a band, the key being that you can play the main riff entirely by plucking single strings - no chords required (as long as you have lots of distortion).  We practiced it in a suburban basement for weeks, then played it at someone's bar mitzvah.  And thus…

I kinda liked "Don't Close Your Eyes."  At the time, anyway - not sure that it would hold up 20+ years later, and I definitely don't want to find out.

Watch the clip in the article above.  If you like it, then you'll probably like the rest - it's pretty representative.

Not sure the Far Side really worked in animation, but the soundtrack is possibly the greatest soundtrack to anything, ever.  It's in regular rotation for me; I'd forgotten it was actually the soundtrack to something.

Dr. Pepper BBQ sauce is gross.  There's a local BBQ joint here that seems to do everything right, and I couldn't figure out why I hate their ribs and pulled pork.  Then I tasted the BBQ sauce (which they slather on everything), and realized that's it.  It's nasty.

Good to know, I'll go gather up my fucking-family.

You got's to sass it. "Quit jiiiiving me, turkey."  (A turkey is a bad person.)

Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.

Interesting article at CNET about this.  Their take is that this is basically HBO saying "It's on, bitch."

It's good, I guess, but it's no Canyonero.

What boobies?  Where?  I missed them!  Dammit!

Yes, as soon as I read that there was a younger brother involved, I automatically assumed it would have to be Michael Cera.

YOU SHALL NOT ROLL (on Shabbos).

http://theoatmeal.com/comic…

Tapatio is the Domino's Pizza of hot sauce.

Really?  I'd take lobster over bacon any day.  You can buy bacon anywhere and it takes 5 minutes to cook.  Lobster is a special-event kinda food (unless you live in Maine), you know?

I don't care how good quality the ribeye is, if you try to braise it in a stew it'll suck.  You don't braise ribeye, you sear it.  If Heather wanted to braise it (which is what she said at judge's table), she should've been working with short rib, brisket, or some other cut that's fatty with a lot of connective tissue…

It's part mop, and part puppet…