"Jeez, Wang, it's a parking lot for Christs sakes!"

"Double farts!!!!!"

Oh shit, that's funny!!
They kind of look like little strips of bacon.

"Third party Nintendo would also likely mean saying goodbye to huge games like Breath of the Wild launching almost completely bug-free. They still have a sense of pride in their output, because they can afford to."
Exactly. Sega, Atari, anybody?
And the "waah, there's a lot of Nintendo games I'd love to play, but I'm…

Yes. Just like Tony Orlando, I too, was found at the crack of Dawn.

something something Lincoln Logues?

MK8 is the ONLY game I play online. It's the only one that I feel like I've got chance in when playing against people who play it 13 hours a day, which I don't.

"the GameCube and Wii U had some of their most creatively strong periods."
Isn't that weird? I've said before on these boards that the Wii U will be remembered like the GC is: a third place system with some of the best games of its generation.
And speaking of the good ol' Cube, I've spent the weekend playing through my…

Absolutely. Third party Ninty would just become Activision or EA, and start cranking out Mario's & Zelda's each year. And instead of the landmark entries we get every five or so years, we'd be drowning in incremental 'updates'.
I know they sell well, but when was the last the time an Assassin's Creed or Madden got…

Come on, AVC.
This an obvious "2001" reference. Dude's hip to Kubrick.

"Dear Penthouse Letters,
I never thought this would happen to me, but….."

Seattle: "We already gave you a Pete Carroll/Richard Sherman combo. You think we're gonna stop now? Silly child…."

Well done, I just threw up.

Like Prozac, without the Prozac.

"Drunk, and in a Ford Fiesta, is no way to go through death, son."

Is that the island that promises all the "hot Lesbos action"?

Thanks for destroying the universe, Jesus.
Christ almighty, I hope the reboot turns out better than the original.

Feel free to crack jokes about white people all day long. Try to aim for southern, toothless hillibillies. That should last you for at least fifty years, until they become the minority, and therefore a 'protected' class.
Holy shit.

"Don't let your dick run your life!".

As a dog being fed a hot dog, I have no words for this kind of bullshit.