"I’ve known [my son] was gay since he was about 4…"

Berle's penis is part of the collection, filed under "P."  And also Q, R, S, T, U, V and W.

David Crosby's liver is black; that's gotta be partial credit.

Admit it.  You're a little touched.

Next week, they'll make up for it by sullying all 8,000 of them.

What do you mean, his penis?  Stop being cryptic.

I look forward to a four-hour-long performance of "And All That Jazz."

TIN ROOF!

Shatner songs come in two varieties: before he realized people were laughing at them, and after he realized people were laughing at them.

Criminals like a superstitious, cowardly twat.

But they'll still have the challenging crossword puzzle, right?

Socket to ME?

Lame.

There was no need to see his wang in Sister Act.

I thought he was Jewish!

The bridge is rainbow— do you need MORE of a road map?

Wait, wait!  The Catholic Church's presence isn't much like nipples on a Batman suit at all!  They're very different things!

I fucked your imam.

The most affecting scene in the movie is a kitchen conversation between the lead terrorist and his encouraging wife.

"Mr. Smith Goes to Washington," "High Noon," "The Right Stuff," "Miracle on 34th Street," and a surprising amount of hentai tentacle porn.