i learned a lot from that, and about the university of minnesota, and that peter graves attended the university of minnesota.

no no no! plural! plural butts.

he's just going to tell them to hold onto their butts.

well, not in 3D. not yet

i was sad and scared!

due to rapid island dwarfism, all of the dinosaurs have shrunk to the size of small yappy dogs, and they are cuddly. but the island has too many raccoons now, who threaten our scaly friends with their freaky amoral ways

reese witherspoon is definitely not afraid of the police right now

"He learned too late that iron man is a feeling creature, and because of that, the greatest in the universe"

and he never needs to worry about running out of ammunition!

i'd be willing to stake some money on the boomerang fish guy

there's already a statler and waldorf mocking obama video, which makes me sad. the guys should be mocking everyone, not supporting some internet person's politics.

he will live tweet his own show throughout

it looks like a lot of the fun of making fun of boy bands is in coming up with the names. "boyz 4 now", "sev'ral timez", "du jour"… probably a lot of others involving the letter z…

"it feels like my toes were covered in slimy purple coprophilic tortoises"

that's a fierce david the gnome

are you afraid of the dark?

i sit in one of the dives
on fifty second street
uncertain and afraid
as the clever hopes expire
of a low dishonest decade
waves of anger and fear
circulate over the bright
and darkened lands of the earth
the unmistakeable odor of vietnamese soft rolls
offends the april night

i think only doctor forrester became a star baby, and mike and the bots became pure energy

i'm actually completely ok with this

a man apologizes to an elephant. elephant rears up, tramples the man into a bloody smear