I've been known to claim that of the ten funniest pieces of dialogue in human history, more than half of them are Simpsons characters lying about their names.

As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball.

As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball.

That was the first time I've read the word "thermoregulate" immediately followed by the word "duh".

That was the first time I've read the word "thermoregulate" immediately followed by the word "duh".

He was waiting for his second term to do that. His whole plan was to first get into a really close battle for re-election.

He was waiting for his second term to do that. His whole plan was to first get into a really close battle for re-election.

And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep,

Jim Belushi is considered trim and handsome there. He's Chicago's version of an Olympic diver.

Jim Belushi is considered trim and handsome there. He's Chicago's version of an Olympic diver.

Which, presumably, is posting comments at the AV Club.

Which, presumably, is posting comments at the AV Club.

They were actually asking if you had any grey poop on.

They were actually asking if you had any grey poop on.

I've been known to tell people that the "Hello, my name is Mr Burns" letter thing is perhaps the funniest piece of dialogue in human history.

I don't know why, but somehow the fact that it was Mr. T who Homer had the opportunity to meet, rather than just about any other celebrity, somehow makes it way funnier.

I don't know why, but somehow the fact that it was Mr. T who Homer had the opportunity to meet, rather than just about any other celebrity, somehow makes it way funnier.

I used that line in real life, sitting around the common room in college in front of the TV. We were looking for something to watch, and the Drew Carey show was on, and I said, "There's Drew Carey. He'll tell us what to do!"

I used that line in real life, sitting around the common room in college in front of the TV. We were looking for something to watch, and the Drew Carey show was on, and I said, "There's Drew Carey. He'll tell us what to do!"