Anyone else getting turned on?

Just like Alaskan Malamutes.

Agreed.

THIS.

Wait a second — Hank Williams Jr is Onion editorial cartoonist Kelly?

And when are Itchy and Scratchy going to get to the fireworks factory?

I know you probably didn't mean anything, but "spineless" is an unfortunate word choice, since Cazale died of bone cancer.

I may be in the minority here, but the wording in the article and the headline sounds backward to me.

Where's the beef?

Where does Melanie Hutsell fit on your scale?

NERD FIGHT!

It's like the French word for brakes on your car, incidentally.

My, uh, friend said he saw it.

FIRSTIES SUCK! Uh huh huh huh huh, huh huh huh huh, huh huh huh.

"We were just outside of Whoville when the drugs began to take hold…"

LOLZORS OH YES

Can you make a picture of Calvin peeing on one?

Hey, I shave my neckbeard!

Stop, stop! He's already dead!

It's funny because he has an erection.