I laughed way more at the plink plonks than anything else I've read today.

I laughed way more at the plink plonks than anything else I've read today.

In search of a mythical dick planet.  No one knows if it truly exists, but this brave explorer is holding out hope.

In search of a mythical dick planet.  No one knows if it truly exists, but this brave explorer is holding out hope.

Hear that everyone?  Lamb of God concerts are a great place to pick up chicks!

Hear that everyone?  Lamb of God concerts are a great place to pick up chicks!

I wouldn't blink an eye if I learned one of the Wiggles was a rapist.

I wouldn't blink an eye if I learned one of the Wiggles was a rapist.

I'm looking forward to Edgar Wright's Ant-Man movie more than basically any other project that's been announced.  I don't even have a snarky joke about ants or penis size to contribute.

I'm looking forward to Edgar Wright's Ant-Man movie more than basically any other project that's been announced.  I don't even have a snarky joke about ants or penis size to contribute.

Amazing ant special effects!

Amazing ant special effects!

I can't wait to take my mother to this movie.  Even though she watches a lot of tv and has probably seen the trailer, I promise she will not remember what this is about.

I can't wait to take my mother to this movie.  Even though she watches a lot of tv and has probably seen the trailer, I promise she will not remember what this is about.

But only if you use your mouth.

But only if you use your mouth.

@avclub-178874fad561e353c21ccdafe08915ca:disqus That's because the ladies who watched 300 waited to do it with all of their friends at home so they could talk over the plot about how sexy Gerard Butler is and whether or not Kelly ACTUALLY got her hair cut like that because now she looks like a hot mess.

@avclub-178874fad561e353c21ccdafe08915ca:disqus That's because the ladies who watched 300 waited to do it with all of their friends at home so they could talk over the plot about how sexy Gerard Butler is and whether or not Kelly ACTUALLY got her hair cut like that because now she looks like a hot mess.

Surely Madea's hit menopause by now.  Those Tyler Perry's Madea's all natural hot flash herbal supplements are going to fly off the shelves!

Surely Madea's hit menopause by now.  Those Tyler Perry's Madea's all natural hot flash herbal supplements are going to fly off the shelves!