Well, if you want to take this pill and imagine what Josh Trank would've done…

*Arrested Development theme song plays*
And THAT'S why you don't get thrown into a Sarlaac pit!

Here's five dollars. Go see a Stab War

H00-Chi MAMA was the biggest selling toy from the Prequels toy line, you bastard!

"Joanie Loves Chachi Although Chachi is Married But He's a Cheater But His Wife Probably Knows About (and, thus, Consents to) It, So It's Not That Horrible, Please Leave It Out of Anything Until Your Second or Third Memoirs When We're All Old, and Probably Divorced" doesn't have the same ring to it.

Why you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking Nerdherder!

When you him love

Well, the article is wrong for pointing to Howard's Lucas-friensly past, as Lucas ain't home any more…

"And when shit him"

In Soviet Russia, chemical reward drinks YOU

Admittedly, yeah, that's a problem. What I'm saying is that as time went on, there were only so many gaming sites that I could trust…

They both have hilariously blonde hair that looks like it belongs on a child's doll

So what's wrong with 1Up? I can't hate on Kotaku without a lot more reason than that, because they earned a good reputation with me. Anyway, what are we supposed to do, run back to the sycophantic, corrupt, untrustworthy click-machine that is IGN?

And we used to just make out for hours and we are what we wanted and no one told us when to go to bed!

Didn't you read the headline? This movie is bigger than Hogan's penis!

They have something for everything!

Is it even consent that they don't care about? This sounds less like thinking that someone owes you sex when they're not in the mood - which, sadly, is also "a thing" - and more like thinking someone owes you the chance to "push their boundaries" or ask them to do something they don't like/aren't in to.

You work… as a goddess? High five!

Given that he was slamming tequila in From Dusk til Dawn, it's a great fit, really

Aw, that's so sweet. All those times he published newswires, we were carrying him