2-way phone conversation?
Lohan rep: No really! Lindsay would be perfect for this part!

Shoot, bitch! Democracy's at stake!

Like an oil company being owned by an auto maker?

Aww man!
Just when my asshole was starting to heal from the last corporate ass-rape…

Have you noticed…
…that if you were to take a black marker to Snooky's face on the cover of her book, it would look like the cover photo is of a black cock?

@tater - There were too spoilers back then. I remember we didn't get to go see ESB the first night, but some kids at school did. And, of course, they got to spoil it for the rest of us. But it was still completely MIND BLOWING! "Luke? Darth? Bullshit! We've got to go see it!"

Have you ever sat on a grown man's lap?

Do you really think Jobs would use the cafeteria?

Yeah, right. They designed the disc to be square because they couldn't draw circles on the computer. It couldn't possibly be that if you want something to go in a slot the same way every time, you give it straight sides.

[Spits white russian all over room]

Decisions
I wish I could make decisions as good as theirs!

Wait a sec… This movie isn't released yet, is it? Is this another 'Pierce' writing that fell through the cracks? How is it one of the best movies of the year if no one has seen it?

Seanosexual

If you want 'A's, get an education degree. If you want an education, get a science degree.

Golden auto-showers for everyone!

See, I thought he knew about all this because when he says "cow" he means "Pam". It think that is funnier than an actual whale vagine.

Karate? The Dane Cook of martial arts?

Carlin? Is that you?

@Funbacker - You're thinking of fluorine. Fluoride is a compound.

They do look somewhat related, don't they? It would be like trading in Blanchett for a newer model.