Just because it's a band's first (or second) album doesn't mean it's the best entry point. I think those albums are great but could potentially turn off a new listener to investigating further.
HAT and Stag are good litmus tests. If you don't like those, you can probably just stop right there.

they're already out

Hostile Ambient Takeover and Stag are two good albums to break your Melvins cherry. Good variety on those two. If you want HEAVY, then The Maggot is it. Conversely, The Bootlicker is the band at their softest (recorded around the same time as The Maggot). Bullhead is the best album from the early days when they were…

What made it even funnier was we were working at a cabinet shop and getting paid very little (I could've made more working at McDonald's). I wanted to ask him the obvious question, "If you're making so much money selling overpriced fruit juice, why in the hell are you working here?"

They're all coming to my Monavie party! All the cool people. Cool people who like living a healthy, exciting, meaningful life. You should get in on this. I'm making money while I sleep, bro.

You asked a question, I answered, you didn't like the answer (or are too dense to fully grasp what I said) so you started calling names. And you also own Beats headphones. Yup, sounds about right.

Feeling a little insecure and defensive I see. Look, you answered your own question and I pointed that out. Yes, the fact that you're valuing design and how you look when you wear them is a BIG reason why this brand gets mocked.

You answered your own question.

Look at all those fawning idiots in the banner pic.

Beats headphones on their last leg already, eh? Let's assume they're one of the very first models to come out, so like 6-7 years old at most? That's a pretty short lifespan for expensive cans.

"Star"

They really keep their noses to the grindstone and are all students of the game.

Their Market Fresh turkey ranch and bacon is great. The funny thing with those sandwiches tho…you'd think they would be healthy compared to the other items offered on the menu but I think they're actually the worst.

Arby's: put our meat in your mouth.

A couple years ago I remember Arby's running commercials in heavy rotation that featured some guy named Bo Dietl. Some fat, bronzed, overly groomed guy who acted like he was king shit. Who the fuck was that guy and why in the hell did Arby's decide it was a good idea to have him be the face of a marketing campaign?…

Well…they have curly fries.

Don't forget about the reel-to-reel. That existed for quite a while before cassettes.

I have no doubt that RDJ has a "vault" that's packed full of unreleased stuff from over the years. Of all his claims to the press through the years, that's one of the most believable.

Xenu's Space Armada featuring Herman Menderchuk

This is actually a great idea and I could see them eventually having small HD cameras on all players in the near future, or even in the damn puck.