Mistletoe alert!

I love when he emerges from hiding under his dead colleague's corpse and whines "fucking faggots left me."

So I guess now it's MR. Cocksucker . . .

"Tom-ah-to soup, one tin of"

Mr. Horton wanted to give Willis a hard time - like he gave Dudley.

In fifth grade my penis was so big that I would often lay atop the short alcove above the chalkboard and swing my penis in wide arcs to erase it - like an upside down windshield wiper.

Holy shit!  Divorce?

Yep - to all of the above comments on Carolla.

Yeah, he's always been that way.

Yeah, he's always been that way.

. . . and pound that ass . . .

. . . and pound that ass . . .

Also, Major Nelson, Dr. Bellows wants to see you.

Also, Major Nelson, Dr. Bellows wants to see you.

I'm pretty sure KFC uses large crows instead of chickens.  Those chicken pieces are small as fuck.

I'm pretty sure KFC uses large crows instead of chickens.  Those chicken pieces are small as fuck.

oh my jesus . . . now I gotta think about vienna sausage juice . . . oh, fucking gross.

oh my jesus . . . now I gotta think about vienna sausage juice . . . oh, fucking gross.

Yep, love Whataburger.  Every couple of weeks I treat myself to the new chicken strip BBQ sandwich - it's pretty damn good.

Yep, love Whataburger.  Every couple of weeks I treat myself to the new chicken strip BBQ sandwich - it's pretty damn good.