Simon Sez is one of my favorite shitty movies. The fact that Dane Cook is in it is extremely appropriate:
1. Not cool, but the movie thinks it's super cool.
2.Not sexy at all, but thinks it's super sexy. (Techno Bed Scene)
3.Not funny, but tries VERY hard, mostly by being loud and obnoxious, and NOT just in the scenes…

My Emo Band Name
If I was in an emo or screamo band, it would be called:
Falling in The Fire of Autumn's Rising Ashes.

Hawthorne Heights
is scientifically proven to convert a penis into a vagina in 1.7 songs. I dated an emo girl once, and it got fucking complicated when she inadvertently transformed me on our first date. If Hawthorne Heights hadn't been on in her car when she picked me up, we probably could've done more than just…

Swing Dancing
The Swing Dance parts were pretty weak until Eric did the "tiny dancer" routine. I'm gonna have to bust that one out on the dance floor sometime. PEOPLE WILL LIKE IT.

I completely agree. For a FOX sitcom, this one was way above average. Bernie Mac may have been lumped in with unfunny "Kings of Comedy" like D.L. Hughley and Cedric the Entertainer (shudder), but he was definitely a cut above.