Is that Keg in the Closet song a Toby Keith song? Because he should be punished for teaching young people poor keg positioning skills. You need maximum exposure to prevent clumping. Every time I got to a party with a keg and some jackass has put it in the corner or in the bathtub, creating the inevitable difficulties…

What do you do in Vegas if you don't drink? And I'm entirely serious with that question - I'd like a full post-Vegas rundown of all the horrors you see and experience without the comforting embrace of alcohol as soon as you get back.

You should never trust any musician that hasn't wrested his or her own instrument from the bowels of hell or built it themselves.

Well, I fucked that link up. Here it is:

The continent of Europe has been hard at work producing mindless, repetitive music for the better part of the last twenty years. There's a god damn gold mine out there for you to mine, man. Perhaps you're not familiar with the oeuvre of one Captain Jack (http://en.wikipedia.org/wik…