Fleetwood Mac Effect. Bands have a lot of intra-member hookups or at least tension unless every member is the same gender and straight. Then its just circle jerks after gigs.

Because the internet. Duh.

All sex scenes should be set to "Yakkity Sax"

Upvoted for typography. Or typornography.

If it were really gross it might be hotter or at least more interesting. The two (?) chapters I read when housesitting for a friend were just dull and possibly written by a virgin.

"sploosh"

If only life gave me more opportunities for that line. Along with,

The best kind of correct

I'm partial to:

I suspect this is going to go into a huge box office dive after the first weekend. The repressed-mom demo who've been crossing and uncrossing their khaki-encased legs in anticipation will come out in droves this weekend but if they want serious smut it was never going to deliver, and I don't get the impression there's…

I want to hear how that works out. I wonder if the gender-reverse version would get traction? Ditch the guitar and just drop in conversation that I've been reading Tristan Tamarino's new book on advanced cunnilingus techniques but haven't been able to try them yet?

I can, but that's because I'm not a penniless hippie!

Another - and I swear I am not making this up - was my friend whom, a few months back, had undergone breast reduction surgery. "I'm so proud of my boobs now," she told me. "Would it be weird if I showed you?"

… oh, Padwan, this story is for another night. Now off to slumberland, and don't let those assertive women in your innocent li'l dreams.

Oh, it's amusing to me too. I think none of my friends believe my stories, but I seem to be stumbling through life as some cross between Pee Wee Herman and Idiotking, a half-aware naif somehow gracefully tripping through a world of debauchery.

In retrospect, maybe serenading a woman with "Anaconda" was a poor choice. Sorry.

Gender-swapped version? If a female friend offered to show me her lingerie I'm sure I'd still be too clueless-slash-unconfident to attempt strumming her instrument. We straight male geeks need more direct signals, such as "I was reading about proper blowjob technique, but unfortunately none of my friends will let me…

I will say that if a boy musician and a girl musician play their guitars alone in a room. it's pretty unlikely they (the people, not the guitars) will stay dressed. Maybe it's the naiveté - shallowness - directionless lust endemic to we alleged musical types, but it gets compounded if both parties are packin'…

Yet men (and women) still operate under the assumption that six stings and a melody is The Magical Pussy Magnet. A guitar can be a great conversations starter - I carry one on business trips so I can play open mics and thus meet people when I'm miserably bored and lonely in strange cities - but I can see the "Oh…

* walks home, scowling, then locks self in room with carefully selected issues of Cosmopolitan lifted from his friend's house. Danny's mom's kinda hot for, like an old lady, ya know. *