I didn't grow up repressed and I still would prefer that to be off limits. I preferred my sexual growth to occur the traditional way: finding wet fragments of Oui in the woods where the big kids hung out and compulsively re-reading the golden showers scene in Arthur Hailey's Wheels, being horrified that people would…

Soggy Hustlers is my next band name.

Don't read it even as a literary hatefuck. It's as if Dan Brown had stumbled across Nicholson Baker and subsequently decided he wanted to write Smut About Great Ideas. I slogged through two chapters, going through giggling at the bad writing to being depressed abut the bad ideas.

You phrased that somewhat more powerfully than I might have, but yeah, it was just us and the delivery nurse. When I was told "I need a hand, quick. Get over here" (as in practically holding the forceps) my thought was not "Gross, I'll never stick Little Rickster in there again" but "This is totally fucking AMAZING!"

You can do your taxes yourself. It'll be empowering, Emancipating. Other "e" words. And you dodge embarrassment and excuses. Probably more "e" words, too but I'm tired.

Preface. I'm not One of Those Guys, and whether from Puritanism or luck or genetics or angels hovering over my shoulder I was never into teenagers, even when a teenager. I was ogling women in their 20s (who ignored me, of course.)

And another side effect is the weird way they treat sex if they should give in to their wanton desires before marching down the aisle. Kids at home take note: when I was a lad I dated (and shared losing virginity) with the very comely daughter of a Pentecostal deacon. Yes, both legal and the same age, now that you…

My mom must be the USA network archetypal viewer. She loved Monk and Burn Notice and I believe is into Physch. Agreed that Shaloub made Monk… I remember first seeing him on an X-Files episode and being struck by how damn good an actor he was. Burn Notice was just bizarre, though. I wasn't a regular watcher but it…

Anyone else remember Shattered the early 90s flick with Greta Scaachi and Tom Berenger? It was a completely demented Hitchcock riff in which (if I can recall correctly) her lover is nearly killed in a car accident and she convinces the hospital it's actually her HUSBAND and they rebuild his face to be that of her…

Thanks for this. I will look it up, as I'm more a sucker for sincere if uneven emotional honesty than expert stylization.

I think the 'repeatedly" is a red flag. That means it's not a passing fancy but a real interest and at the risk of being sexist, judgmental, old-fashioned and dense, I think an interest in rape play from a man may be different from that in a woman.

I may be totally off, but your phrasing, the way you use nuanced language, doesn't say "free-range horndog" to me. Maybe corndog but one who prefers the context of emotional closeness. And don't discount the hot guy option. Hot comes in many flavors. Just mean go for the kind that really puts the wind in your sails so…

Just be sure he's: a) hot as hell; and b) not too close geographically. That way if you feel a bit conflicted afterward you can console yourself knowing you engaged in the carnal two-step with a prize hunk of stallion, and you have a nice cushion so you won't run into him again without both of you making an effort.…

But…but…sharing is good! Victimless crime! Music should be free!

I may be incorrectly reading between some lines but you may want intimacy more than you want boning. FWB with a guy with whom you have a history and who's pretty well proven he's genuinely poly may not be the best thing now. Have you considered a really honest-to-goodness one-night hookup to get the itch out of your…

You two are young and believe me it is a lot tougher to try new cities/careers/lifestyles once your brain has calcified with age and the repercussions of a move - dues to mortgages, kids, "career options" etc. - are greater. And as a music lifer, bands dissolve and reform at a dizzying rate.

"Food for thought" is possibly not the right choice of words.

In Trailer Park of the Apes the orangutans, by dint of their superior intellect, have the double-wides and run an ad-hoc community council in the old abandoned rec center with the empty swimming pool. Bodies are strung up from the rickety clotheslines and TV aerials that constitute a skyline. A spunky chimp in cutoffs…

Richard Lloyd.

Alex Rose's voice: Ethel Merman with a sinus infection.