Wheel of Time!  Good grief; I'm picking up a copy of the last book today from the library, but I have actively discouraged friends from starting that series. 

One of my earliest memories is of a park down the hill from my house that had a big swing with a plastic kite on top.  The kite had a face and rosy red cheeks and I remember thinking that it must be part of the Land of Make-Believe because it looked like Mr. Roger's puppets.  I think what's astonishing about Fred…

I disagree.  This maneuver (with the words "I just had to do that.  Goodnight!") is exactly how my first kiss went with my now-wife.  Totally works.