That's mom for mad.

I'm very ashamed of you, Janine.

Just listen to the song "Flux".

@avclub-e2684ea2157a2423b7463536886837b2:disqus Well, it's an average.

The "I'm gonna die" joke reminded me a bit too much of an old Simpsons bit, but she really sold it.

Guy Fieri went to your high school?

Though his reasoning was wrong.

Aw, and I just got onboard.

Are you doing a bit?

Mary Tyler Moore Tyler Moore Moore Moore - Happy Endings

GET SOME FUCKIN NUTSSSSS

Boredeath?

Is your friend at South Pole Station? If so, it's entirely possible!

I will certainly be reading this book, if only for completion's sake, and yet I'm not sure how to feel about it. I'm sure it doesn't help that I started reading this series when I was only generally aware of the existence of alcohol and I'm currently decently toasted. Oh Mr. Jordan, why couldn't you have finished all…

I was going to say something about the supposed height of Rand al'Thor, but then again Tom Cruise did just play Jack Reacher in a major Hollywood movie, so who the fuck knows?

I'm not drunk enough, so I just want you guys to know that you're all awesome, except for narwhal.

I've been drinking for about ten hours, so I don't know what you're talking about. Foots balls?

I'm writing a screenplay.

THE COLLECTED ONLINE WRITINGS OF DAN HARMON SUCKS

I'm going for the convenient parking and large number of TVs.