No. You're so goddamned wrong it's scary. Even if someone is conscious that doesn't mean they're in a position to consent.

That's a stupid comparison that you're stupid for making.

I'm glad her career is over. This woman can go right to hell.

I know a couple people who named their kid Cash. I think it's a reference to Johnny Cash, but it's still stupid.

I know at least 4 people who have dogs named Harley. Guess what they drive.

I've wanted to pull that move so many times, but I'd probably just get punched.

A few years ago I found this movie in a two-for-one bargain bin with Heathers. I now know how new moms feel when their babies are handed to them.

I wanted to by Lynn more than anything.

So original, bro! You should write for Family Guy!

Slow. Slow. Quickquick slow.

LOL. White knighting or the Monkees. I don't think you know what that phrase really means.

And yet you clicked on the article, you adorable stupid fuck, you.

The Monkees and Laugh-In. I miss old Nick at Nite.

Which child would you rather beat up? Cousin Oliver or Sam from Diff'rent Strokes?

I know that I watched that movie a million times as a kid and I still can't tell you why I loved it so much.

I miss selfies with the old instants. It was so fun to get those pictures back and laugh and be surprised. My sister was a master at taking hilarious stealth-selfies with other people's cameras.

I'm sure you meant to type "read up on", but that typo is pretty great.

But you're a piece of shit, so no one would do that.

Neither is his penchant for violence.

Look at you not knowing shit about shit but that doesn't stop you from acting like you know shit. You are a true American, sir.