Until his mistress told him he could fire it off, obviously.

Did he finally bite her? My girlfriend told me the fucker couldn't even pull that trigger when she was dying giving birth and had to inject her with a syringe of his "venom."

This is exactly how we got 1991 Shannon Tweed films in the first place.

I got to interview her once. Very nice to talk to, very easy flow of conversation.

I watched "Silent Night, Deadly Night" recently. It's amazing how many horror films thought, "Hey, a murder scene. Great time to get the tits out. GREAT time." Then they lit a cigar and yelled into very large cell phones.

So…Zodiac Motherfucker, but he has a goatee?

Jim Belushi deserves every joke they make about him.

He is so perfect in that role. Grand-dad's mercurial switches between irate and excited when he's dispensing wisdom after a lifetime of keeping his head down just to get to that gorgeous neighborhood and not have to talk to anybody unless he wants to. I frigging love that show.

Ninjas don't eat unless it helps them blend in.

I thought that the worst part about Limbaugh's apology was that he claimed to be contrite and sincere and not just trying to retain the dozens of bailing advertisers.

Well sure, I liked it too, but would you say you're a huge Avatar fan or are you just glad you went to see it? On a scale of "Don't regret it to" to "Awkward Avatar-themed wedding proposal," what's your fandom? Collectible glasses? Browse the slash-fiction?

Ice cream to eat, or…?
Okay, fine, to eat.

I thought California was funny as a pompous ass, but I don't get how he got more than a few episodes without the love for him wearing off and them realizing his spectacular mystique just cloaked a sad asshole. If they're keeping that for a season closer, it's just going to be a wet fart of an emotional realization.

Makes sense. The beard is the mustache of Azerbaijan.

Yeah, but it's always because Dear Leader has returned to building Heaven for us out of bricks made from his own glory.

I was 16 and I'd never heard of Dune when a friend sat me down, almost offended that I hadn't seen it. An ungodly number of years later, the film ended, and all I could say was, "…Why did you DO that to me??"

Is anyone this into Avatar? Anywhere? Like I've never met one person that honestly gave a shit about this movie. I just thought we kind of went to see it of a sense of pop cultural obligation to the piles of cash and decades of dreaming James Cameron put into it, and congratulations, the 3-D was lush. But is there…

I…didn't find this funny. Should I have given it more the 93 seconds?

@avclub-1b1f9a3e639ecc53f335314fc9d8403b:disqus "Not anymore. Rush Limbaugh, of all people, ruined that for everyone."

They've been plotting this since his character was auditioning replacements, including that superspy chick who's basically Poochie.