No no no, he will build a robot that has the knowhow to forge passports.

My sister drives that beast, and she constantly defends its gas mileage and roominess (three kids).

Edie McClurg?

How much is that in Simpsons quotes?

I didn't like it when Deadwood raptured everyone.

No, he was a Ratzi posing as a limey, but The Spirit defeated him.

There's your actual suicidal friend you have to worry about at one end, and at the other there's your friend who, just as you arrive at work, lets you know that they're going to kill themselves, then turns off their cell phone.

He's an absurdist, trying to show us we're all absurdists and don't have any choice in the matter so long as we're alive.

Now if only Marky Mark would let that Korean store owner he blinded take one of his eyes in return.

He also admitted he was wrong and Cook was right about one thing that would be funnier, and vice versa about another thing. So: even score.

The comedian angle helps. Knowing that he's out there in the dark and snow just pounding the earth for some kind of truth, it forgives almost all of his assholery. Doesn't excuse it but man, he took arms against a sea of troubles. He decided early on he was going to chase this soothsayer thing to its end, no matter…

Which one features Rooney? I can't waste my time with this Morley Safer malarkey. I might croak at any minute.

What are birds, grandpa?

You'll have to queue up behind Chuck Klosterman.

You are fast becoming one of my favorite posters, Snidely.

Excellently done, dear boy! You shall receive a "Like" of your very very own! Off you go now, to spend on pennywhistles and moon pies.

They're all monsters, those Eastern Europeans. Look what they did to Prussia!

Jonathan Swift would have favored these breasts, if only for their satirical potential and literal lusciousness.

Swedish Chef. Bork bork bork.

I shouldn't love your schtick as much as I do.