"Safari" or GTFO.

Amazingly, you are correct.

Oh man, I sympathize, I have ridiculously sensitive skin. You could try a baking soda paste, or I've found that coconut oil is soothing. If all else fails, you probably should consider seeing a dermatologist to get something prescription strength.

I've been having a mild earache on and off, just on the right side. WebMD tells me it's a brain tumor.

It sounds like the screenwriter watched Ruby Sparks, liked the idea of a meta romantic comedy, then thought "Well, I really need to water it down to appeal to a larger audience."

I would definitely want to be a part of this.

Your mayor has a head like a canned ham. Meanwhile, I have a brand new mayor who hasn't done anything embarrassing yet, but it'll probably happen at some point.

Me as Tippi Hedren in The Birds: http://distilleryimage6.s3….

My favorite scene, to the point where I've sought it out on YouTube, is when they discover baby Pubert is sick when he's grown beautiful golden curly hair.

He's not really stand-up per se, but Chris Elliot's Daddy's Boy is genuinely funny.

I cannot believe I just read three paragraphs about the cultural impact of The Jerky Boys.

Okay, I don't love lamp that much.

It's just been done to death at this point. There's literally nothing new to say about the riot grrl movement, Nirvana, Terminator 2, etc., etc. And I say that being a member of Generation X, and most of us don't know how to have a conversation without dropping some sort of pop culture reference into it.

So great. "Born of Frustration" was another, possibly even better single, but it didn't make it much past late night "120 Minutes" airplay.

I think I dated Adam Goldberg in Dazed and Confused.

Neither movies have aged nearly as poorly as Empire Records.

I'm not sure, other than perhaps in Saving Private Ryan, Adam Goldberg hasn't played a character who was kind of loathesome.

Wait, you mean not everyone in the 70s was totally fucking cool and laidback, man?

I was kinda obsessed with this movie for a little while, going so far as to buy a supplement book that looked like a yearbook. As far as high school movies from the 90s are concerned, it holds up a bit better than, say, Can't Hardly Wait.

Aw, this makes me sad. They were so awesome, and "Daughters of the Kaos" was a really underrated track.