They've finally tapped the household in which I was raised, the coveted "dads who watch Lifetime" demographic.

Jay Oakerson's agreement to participate in the Hatesong series at all means he deserves worse than he got.

Bulk him up and have him play Flash Thompson, that's what the kids want, that good old fashioned half-assed swipe at irony that references shit they never saw.

Who also happens to be a bit player in projects by the same people as both movies. These things are kind of interesting when they cite eerie coincidences that rise above the level of Hollywood as usual. This one, like most, never does.

I loved that part, I was like, is your argument that this guy shot like himself?

The puzzle is "what am I doing with my life?" and the solution is "trying to see things in the wave of blood from The Shining".

You see, Muslims worship the pharaohs of Egypt in underground cults.

Wrong. 3 has aged poorly. The first and second have aged wonderfully except for some of the effects, which weren't at the heart of those movies anyway.

It kind of spoiled my patience as a kid for waiting on sequels. I didn't realize that most sequels put together less than a year after the first movie's release turn out more Son of Kong than Scream 2.

The reason it worked was because people found the film entertaining regardless of their meta-knowledge of horror film structure. Contrast with "Cabin in the Woods", which depended entirely on that knowledge having become truly popular culture, something for which "Scream" is largely responsible.

Disagree.

This isn't even fun or funny to think about for a second. It's just a weird thing to say.

Carnegie had more money at the time than all of America. They were living like rappers. They weren’t paying income tax. People didn’t pay income tax until, like, 1915. So there was this 10-year period that was this golden age. But you look now, people have pretty much figured out how to legally not pay income tax, so…

Loved the first, will never see the second.

*holds envelope to head Carson style* And the next line, delivered by a frightened woman: "Oh no."

There was a time and a place for Bendis superhero comics. It was the mid-2000s, when I could pick up a Marvel comic book and realize that the scripts were now only as ridiculous as middling television fantasy dramas and have my mind blown by the improvement over my 1990s youth.

Whoa, these guys. It's been ages, here's where I'm at with these guys in my head: "the new thing after maudlin".

What, Predators?

Melissa McCarthy in prosthetics.

This movie, you can remake forever because of the ending. It doesn't really matter if people know it already. I never mind a remake of this movie as long as the cast is sound. Everything else about the movie can bite, really, it's fine.