Watch out for hop-ons… you're definitely gonna get hop-ons.

At least you won't have hop-ons.

…and that's why you don't yell.

Affordable Luxury
I like how the theme of "affordable luxury" is utterly belied by items like "$10,000 vacations to a destination spa, $8,000 to $18,000 watches, and a year's worth of Botox, Restylane and microdermabrasion valued at $3,000." When I think of an "affordable luxury," a supreme (opposed to a deluxe) car…

Chester Cheetah
Man, that cheetah used to be so cool. I remember him pushing the lever to "dangerously cheesey" in commercials from my elementary school days. Now, he encourages assholish behavior, like in that other commercial where he endorses staining other people's clothing with Cheeto dust.

In Real Life
From the trailer, wouldn't this entire film be avoided if Liam Neeson's daughter had just shut up? She's all like "I think they're gone" and then the kidnappers promptly grab her.

What's the best thing about fucking twenty four year-olds? There are twenty of them!

Why has no one brought this up yet?
"'Of Simon and Garfunkel, the one that was not Garfunkel.' Sean Connery?"
"I Garfunkeled your mother last night!"

littlealex mentioned Rachael Ray, but what about her Food Network colleague Paula Deen? That woman puts butter on everything. Everything.

My God, you're on to something. But, it just might be that anything related to death can be interpreted as shitty goth poetry.

I don't think she's much healthier. Last I heard of her, she was getting a divorce. And was having crack for breakfast.

But Maramaduke has always been more consistent than Family Circus.

Well, technically, she is press. I don't know if the proprietors of tribute.com expected a favorable report, but distributing press releases is a cheap way to get publicity, without the thunderous pain of other methods of marketing.

How about Nixon's head singing?

Member-Supported Public Radio
Hey, they were on NPR this morning!

"I'll take Jap-Anus Relations for $800!"

Steven Spielberg's non-union German equivalent.

General Impression
It seems that no one enjoyed the making of this movie. At all.

The real Burl is above such coarse language, impostor!

MILF Island
Gold Case