Maybe you just have a highly civilized dog?

Saying that diabetes is a disease of civilization is about as accurate as saying the same about cancer.  That lifestyle factors contribute to diabetic onset doesn't imply that they completely account for it.  Diabetes was around long before Krispy Kreme and television; cancer was around long before Marlboros and…

And, no doubt, countless infections.  You'd think 5000+ years of research on billions of people might have led to the emergence of sterile technique—or at least its immediate adoption once it was discovered by others.

AD; DR.

I'm guessing you mean "Citizens On Patrol": http://www.youtube.com/watc…

Indeed!  I love Ralph Lauren's assless blazers.

When I was a little Herman, the Davis art for the slasher parody "Arbor Day" (December 1981) grossed me out hardcore.  I can still nauseously recall a drawing of a cop eagerly biting into a (human) meat pie.  Blecch, indeed.

My first thought was that head/leg:baseball/bat makes for a goofy game.  If the adult head weighs about 10 pounds, and the leg about 15, then there's going to be a lot of short pitches and bunts—especially in the days before juicing.  Why not use the heart as the ball and flay the skin from a humerus for a bat?

Get the hell out of my phone, please!!

Ooh, that's a smart joke…  If it's originally yours, nice work!

Or, being Lincoln, some mustardayonnaise.

No, I'm pretty sure it's a standard encapsulated tang hot dog.

Don't be ashamed, but do go watch the series.  You'll love it.

What if you only use the tip?

I wouldn't yet rule out Quinn as the puppetmaster behind these untimely deaths.  Maybe they were all in a tontine for some hidden pirate trove of ancient fat chick jokes, discovered while they struck the set for Tough Crowd.

Never thought of Peanuts that way, but it makes sense.  If Chuck was the one always pulling away the football from Lucy, he'd be an abusive asshole on par with Andy Capp.

Don't tell him: he may be studying your travel patterns. 

Hey, that song is offensive to stutterers!  Linguist!!

Well, those are talents of a sort…

As with SNL sketches, he does it mostly when Horatio Sanz is making goofy faces at him.  Or when the act has gone on ten minutes too long and becomes intensely painful to endure.  These two events often coincide.