"Music by Jimmy Page" in the Death Wish trailer credits!  Apart from "Four Sticks" off Led Zeppelin IV, this might be the coolest thing he's ever done.  He's still a wanker, though.

The Cosby Show, MC Hammer, Sinbad…the negroes were so much less terrifying back in the HW Bush years.  Then Clinton gets into office, and suddenly they're all singing about killing their landlords.

What's with the little beeping noise?  Is it some sort of "watermark" they added to prevent people from pirating it?  'cuz the song itself should be enough to prevent people from pirating it.

This gives me the same smug sense of self-satisfaction that I got when my cousin finally admitted that Phish weren't as awesome as he thought they were in college…in fact, they kinda sucked.

In my experience, Muslims all act suspiciously guarded, a little TOO standoff-ish (what are they hiding?), and seem to dislike Americans.

Weird, I also played Turkish folk songs, but on the oud.  Did a bunch of other stuff.  I'm surprisingly industrious when I don't have a girlfriend.

No love for Dr. Marvin Monroe?  WTF???

Saw the leaked pictures.  They're the masturbation equivalent of getting drunk off mouthwash: it's a rough ride, but it'll get you where you need to go.  The boobs look pretty good, but her butt & legs look a little bony, and I hate her as a blonde.  Speaking of which, she doesn't give up any furburger in the pictures…

Jeez, dude, thanks for making everyone's weekend much less interesting.

It's "Independence Day" mixed with "Speed 2: Cruise Control".  If you're going to make a movie based on a game, go with "Mousetrap".  That game was the greatest.

Will any of the plot points involve him giving himself a vodka enema?  (True fact: it's  actually fairly common among Russian alcoholics.  The colon is able to absorb alcohol, so you can get drunk without having to drink whatever godawful rotgut vodka that you can afford if you live in Russia.  You can also safely…

Hah!  Yes, all of a sudden the debate turned from "MUSLIMS ARE GOING TO KILL YOU AND EVERYONE YOU LOVE!!!" to "FEDERAL SPENDING IS OUT OF CONTROL!!!"  I don't know much about this Grover Nordquist cat, but he's got Nyarlathotep-level powers of mob control.

Damn, Bat_Boy, what happened???  You use to be cool, man!

"Good Heavens!  The Minx has been raped by a Mau-Mau!"  (stifles laughter)

"A Confederacy of Dunces".  My all-time favorite book, and the whole story of Toole killing himself and his mom finding the manuscript is just great.

Well, Suck Piggy didn't disappoint….but then, a band of young Japanese girls could be playing with their own feces and I'd be satisfied.

My thoughts exactly.  Same old classmates on Facebook, but now they're all divorced, flabby, and still live within two miles of our old high school.  It's why I had to delete my old account and start a new one with an alias.

GHOTI!

Good call.  I think I remember Beavis gleefully whipping the reindeer: "On Donner!  On Prancer!  On Dancer!  Heheheheh!"

The "Poison" video, man, that's a blast from the past!  I use to jerk off to the chick in that all the time!  (By "use to", I mean thirty seconds ago).