This tube goes up your butt, this one goes in your mouth, and this one goes in your ear. No, wait . . .

Yes, I came here to post this . . . sounds like Bob watched a few Louis Theroux episodes and was like "I could do that shit". But Louis Theroux is a friend of mine, and you, Mister Saget, are no Louis Theroux.

I hear he plays the rippin blues solos in the end credits himself.

'connoisseur of ponytails' sounds dirty . . I mean say it a few times, the phrase is just . . . greasy somehow.

"Mother pus bucket . . . "

I actually read that whole bit about the book thinking that it WAS Chuck Norris advising him and correcting his quotes from philosophers, and I honestly didn't bat an eyelash . . now I'm sad.