No way is Crystal Skull better than Last Crusade.

I didn't realize it was possible to convey a smirk through text until i read this post. Smug level off the charts.

Hey, my wife was just hired to do a commentary on the new Crystal Skull special 3-disk blu ray about the history of aliens and indigenous cultures. According to her, Crystal Skull still sucks.

Sucked your dick until it was hard? It wouldn't already be rock hard at that point?

Stop being a fudge packer and buy a DS. The library of great games for it is impressive.

Being forced to confront mortality makes you want to end the short amount of life you have earlier? Life: you're doing it wrong.

"Rookie isn't a bad movie. It's also not good."

Cool home page link brah

So what drugs do you take?

Dr. Who: like soccer, something I'm frequently forced by non-Americans to acknowledge "exists"

Yep, the Simpsons is like your grandpa.

Name me one comedy radio show where they don't laugh at their own jokes.

Yes please idiotking, regale us with your tales of evil corporate America. Because you once were involved with them, you see. I'm sure you know all the ins and outs.

Distractingly voiced by an old woman

Go suck a horse's dick shithead.

Goodnight, sweet prince.

You have a Neon Genesis avatar. Which means you likely have autism and have never been on a date.

I was glad they went the "let's get even more convoluted and head trippy" route with Reloaded.

I'm sick of this silly idea that if some people are making obscene amounts of money, that means less money for others.

Interviewer is a fucking pussy. Thinks he's clever bringing up something he read on the AV Club, loses his nerve when she starts pressing him on it. Fucking Moviefone.