My real conversation with a Barnes and Noble employee:

Girsten

Incubus 4 eva.  Shat+Esperanto=Awesome

All things considered, this review was written pretty shittily.

I've never been to Wal-Mart, but now that I know they're anti-teacher's-union, I'm gonna have to hit them up.

She'd totally get my vote if I wasn't a convicted felon.

When choosing between Brendan Gleeson and Ray Winstone, it usually comes down to a coin flip.

Watched this one last night, and I think a B- is the perfect grade. It does a solidjob of building a few compelling storylines that always threaten to violently collide, but the resolutions were ultimately underwhelming.

They should sell tufts of his beard hair to Eric Cartman.

And Polanski is helming the adaptation of Uncle Wiggily, right?

I prefer Big Lidia.

Walk Hard!

Coach recruits Jesse for an undercover sting. As Marlo's hauled away in cuffs, Jesse is hoisted slo-mo onto the shoulders of his fellow officers, as the Baltimore streetlights blaze above.

Salt Lake City:

@ Frankenstein's Monster, I agree, The Woman was pretty good stuff, and didn't it just get a distribution deal? Red was good, too. Love this guy.

Like watching a movie whilst seated atop a paint-shaker.

Donny D's… on back up! Drug-free…so put the crack up!

Mafia vs. Ninja is the obvious pinnacle.

Merlin Olsen. Or that Opie guy from Sons of Anarchy.

Doesn't Sydney have a longer running time than Hard Eight? I thought I read that somewhere…