Almost. Then you see Seagal's The Patriot, one of those laundering gigs, and you realize there's nothing cool about it. The Patriot has been, until now, the worst movie I've ever seen, so I'm going to have to see this one at some point.

Everything in moderation. I enjoy this style since, like iceberg lettuce with your favorite dressing, it's a vehicle for tasty indulgence with little nutritional value, but one Guy Ritchie is probably plenty.

DING!

I just saw X-Men: Apocalypse, Ghostbusters, and Star Trek Beyond for free on the plane. I'm still a little shaken up by how bad they were. I take a peek out the window at a recent crop of "blockbusters" and it's a full shitstorm out there, validating my Almost Never Go To The Movie Theater concept, and i haven't even…

Pull of the month right there, bravo.

You'll get more value out of that flash flood story though. Long-term dividends. And a better eye for campsites.

M'lady? There's a gentleman from Bear Island holding his guts in his hands, he'd like a brief audience.

And the coating goes….where? Look at the upside, your small intestine is now dishwasher-safe.

Don't over-blend! Pancake batter should be smooth, but leave some chunks in the waffle batter. It is known.

The question soon becomes…what will the octopus legs do with you? When they are of you, and you them?

Don't get me started on Krampus.

Definitely a Tommen, except instead of uncle-fathers he's got uncle-brothers. Maybe 90% Tommen, 10% Robin.

You're thinking of Sucker Punch, where Trump turns around and kicks his supporters in the balls, pisses on them with a hot ropey stream of broken campaign promises, and graciously accepts a whimpering bootlick.

It's worth it for the Terrigen mist on the popcorn.

Stars even. Not actors. Stars.

I'm not a terribly violent fellow, but I try to stay in shape just in case a golden opportunity like this comes along to justifiably beat a man unconscious.

The cornrows will need to be balanced with an NRA endorsement.

I didn't even wait, I just grabbed her by the kitten.

"The one on which he's been playing. On which."

Early voting in FL by Hispanics has already eclipsed total turnout in 2012, while the Hispanic share of the vote has gone up several percentage points since. I get the feeling "certain groups" are ready to stake a claim against this turd in numbers for which the polls are not accounting.