[squeaking wheels]

http://i34.tinypic.com/692a…

Were they all Milford men?

(in the voice of Professor Farnsworth)

They are neck and neck, salsa. Twighlight will come and go… Tyra is only just beginning to build herself as a "brand." Does she have a clothing line out yet?

…why is your skin color coming off? WHAT THE HELL?! These sheets are ruined! You didn't tell me this was paint!

Oh sympathy monster, I wish you'd stay in my closet forever. You made middle school bearable for me.

The bee bit my bottom
and now my bottom's big.

*falls off a cliff in wheelchair*

I will not sit idly by
while you disparage the good name of JELLYBEANS!

"No rock can smash the horrifyingly engorged gonad of Louis Canon."

Werewolves.
The guys in this are not werewolves. Werewolves are bipedal, hulking masses of terror that will rip you to bloody, gory shreds. And the worst thing is, this is a curse. You cannot control your actions. You can kill your loved ones and not recollect it. These guys are glorified animorphs. Fuck these guys.

I get a kick out of the part in the trailer when Bella slaps the shirtlass dude and then he gets flustered and turns into A GIANT FUCKING DOG/WOLF.

I always read this as Scruffy from Futurama.

I have to deal with the reality of my genitals every goddamn day.

Nicely done. I wouldn't dare say it out loud—but that was some good satire right there, I tell you what.

*orders some Stephen Fries*

Is anyone
Going to read and review Sarah Palin's new book? Seriously. Do it. Come on, Zack? Donna? Keith?

Thanks Bruce.
Thanks for being so awesome. Seriously, if I were to cast the ultimate pop-corn movie, you and Chris Walken are in.

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