…I wish I had a secret downvoter…

The only fast food burgers I can stand are Steak & Shake and Hardee's. With Hardee's, though, the rest of the food I've tried there is disgusting.

*orders McRib, furiously studies Book of Genesis to see how God turned a rib into Eve*

[Black Francis jots down everyone's name as potential Paz Lenchantin replacements]

I got Nelson Muntz, and as much as I hate to admit it, is probably accurate.

This Man's One Weird Trick For Getting Social Media Clicks
[picture of Sean O'Neal]

Which '90s Alt-Rock Dude Are You?

I don't remember a thing about the cartoon but I can picture the video game perfectly. That and DuckTales are two of my favorite NES memories.

[FARTS]

The ones that infuriated bigots.

Tegan and Sara's "Living Room" is infinitely better.

Remember Nathan Rabin? He's back- in Erik Adams form!

He went to his grandma's place while we're spraying for potato bugs.

It's times like that I lose sympathy for Milhouse…

When he was young, my dad worked at Denny's, where he once made an omelet for Buddy Rich. What I wouldn't give to overhear a 2am conversation with a drunk Buddy Rich.

I like it!

The deep-fryer's here. You can flash-fry a buffalo in 40 seconds!

What the hell is "email?"

Ron Paul with a drinking problem.

The last time I went to a Bengals game they were playing Jacksonville, and I was kind of disappointed because I wanted to see a real team play.