At first I thought your avatar had a gun, which would have made your (already great) user name even better.

"What's a beautiful broad like you doing with a malacca like him?"

I just LOL'd as I imagined Jiminy Cricket asking Pinocchio what was so bad about the internet comment on porn that made it get deleted.

Bullshit.  I just saw the Wedding Present a few weeks ago and even though it was just Gedge and three hired guns on guit, bass and drums, they sounded JUST LIKE when I saw them 15 years prior, when it was still at least 3 originals.  I think a casting call for a Moz/Marr tour bassist and drummer would have at least a f…

Only if you thought he was pronouncing beautiful as "beeYOOTee-iful". Otherwise it doesn't fit the meter of the line.

FLAGGED

Straight from the "true story bro" dept:
When I was in 5th grade I loved horror fiction so naturally I became somewhat obsessed with Poe. In addition to reading most of his stuff and doing a report on his life I went so far as to memorize a shortened version of The Tell Tale Heart from a children's "ghost story" record…

Sad story, Bro.  'Mide Stain.

Jesus, what kind of horrible backwoods location do you live in where the matinee prices are only $5?  That same cavalcade of dogshit is playing at my local cinema and it costs $9 for a matinee seat, and that's just for the first two shows!  Matinees USED to mean any show before 6 PM.  What the fuck happened to that…

I bet the post-Thanksgiving football games were a lot of fun at your house.

Count me in with the weird rotating antenna crowd.  My dad usually only messed with it when he was trying to watch blacked out Padres-Dodgers games from LA.  The little magic box glowed, buzzed and then clicked when the desired direction was achieved.

Shit and fuck.  I was hoping to be the first one to make the RH gags!

I want a t-shirt with your avatar on it.  If it's bright yellow, all the better.

Here I am, innocently eating lunch at my desk, when up pops the startling visage of Mr Peepers, enlarged to horrifying proportions.  Thanks for killing my appetite, O'Neal.

I too listened with rapt fascination at just how damned excited Lionel Ritchie was about this album.  I'm guessing that no one has wanted to talk to him for a long, long time.

Thanks for the vote of confidence, Professor.  Hell, I'm just pleased to be considered part of the "commentariat"!

Totally my fave of the dark rides.  Mellow, friendly, amusing…warm in the winter (when you go to "hell").

Crappy movie adaptation or no, this is still my fave ride at Disneyland.

I "liked" all these comments, because, you know.  Achewood.

Agreed.  While passing through Oregon on our way to Canada a few years ago, I tried to pump my own gas and received a stern upbraiding from the yokel pump jockey.  Then I felt guilty and gave him a couple bucks "for his trouble".  What a dipshit I am.