Don't worry guys I'll BMX our way out of this one! Wait killer robots?.. nevermind

I went to the Mazda Museum outside of Hiroshima once and they do actually just skip over the war years in their big timeline wall art thing. However its a super cool museum anyway

This at least the 3rd person in these comments not to get it. Are all the people who don't understand the Onion coming here today?

Something, something lens flare….

they'll both get finished at the same time…

I keep thinking it's a video game and I'm in the "see through walls" mode or "X-Ray Vision" power.

I combined both of them in my head. Somehow it end up not being sexy, I think I'm doing something wrong

But I stayed for the Gladiator references.

You know if he had showed up naked in the Fred Meyer I frequent that would not have surprised me somehow.

THAT'S what HR stands for? I really need to start visiting them weekly with "issues"

scuttles sideways into an elevator and lets out a deep sigh.

"But nobody love SOLANGE!"

I immediately pictured her scuttling off like Zoidberg.

That's the mystery here isn't it? Why the open hostility towards people who maybe think spending that much on a watch is silly no matter how rich you are? We all know the only status symbol that matters is the quality of you BMX bike

Sorcery. That's why these watches cost so much, retaining a wizard ain't cheap

I was cleaning out the server room at my office a month ago and found a stash of old floppy disks with client docs and Outlook back ups from the late 90's early 00's. We of course have no way to access the data and thank god none of the attorneys demanded we find out what's on them. I also found the itunes backup…

Well I assume it's capable of sweet jumps as the camera spins around it going in and out of slo mo right? Oh also in a dark and gritty rain storm so we can see slo mo rain drops hit the windshield

I watched this with the sound off because I'm at work. And it still hurt my ears

Bmx Bandit wheelies into room, does an endo and knocks over a teamster. Immediately gets punched off bike sheepishly walks bike out of room

Then he'd be a fool! Obviously you can't keep Mesozoic Segways in captivity they go crazy and tip over, which never happens to free roaming Segways