Far Down
Man, this column is buried so deep. Can we not at least switch spots with Coming Distractions?

Fucking love Hot Rod. When he's training in the woods, I was already laughing so hard then "OH SHIT" he tumbles down the hill for minutes. That, I know, is the hardest I've ever laughed in a theater. I was dry heaving.

Dude.
For a second there, you had me going, O'Neal. I would've have watched that.

Hey!
I work in advertising and those aren't true!

JJ, is that you?

If only you hadn't been.

Ray Wise.

Shit, bondfool. You ever seen the texting one with the girls? Horrifying.

They'll just have everybody locked in for three years. I assume CBS has the right to reneg if the ratings start tanking. Same thing with HIMYM.

other shit

be shoppin'

Ugh
Look at that smug motherfucker.

We Were Promised Jetpacks
That's how I prefer my Scottish anthemic rock.

But…
…where does Twilight figure into all this?

And So Begins…
…the trend of eating lots of food=evil. We'll see it again soon.

Hold up. The black kid's last name was Turnipseed? Shit. Ahh…the stuff you don't notice when you're 5 years old.

http://youtu.be/cS_lD9_Ur3g

I just graduated from school in Nashville. Best four years of my life there. Now that everybody's out as Nashvillians here, sad I didn't know about you guys before.

That's "Oedekerk," jackass. My eighth-grade self would steal your lunch money.

Bai Ling sucks.